AdvocateWeb - Helping Overcome Professional Exploitation - Sexual Exploitation of Clients
AdvocateWeb - Helping Overcome Professional Exploitation - Sexual Exploitation of Clients
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AdvocateWeb
Guestbook

 

If you provide your name and/or email address, it will appear in the guestbook along with your comments.  You don't have to provide your name or email address in order to submit an entry in our guestbook.  If you prefer, you could just give your initials.
A caution about including your email address:
Spammers (people who send mass unsolicited commercial advertisement emails) indiscriminately scan the pages of websites, harvesting email addresses for the purposes of sending ads.  We should warn you that putting your email address in any website's guestbook places you at risk of receiving more spam emails.

Posting in this guestbook indicates your agreement to abide by the following rules:
Postings that do not respect these rules will be deleted.  No commercial solicitations or "spamming" is permitted.  Use of profanity is not permitted.  Please, no posting of messages that may be construed as defamatory in nature, naming specific alleged perpetrators. That's not the purpose of this guestbook.   Since we have no way of investigating allegations made on an anonymous guestbook, it would be irresponsible for us to permit  such postings.   We DO encourage you to speak out against abuse, if you choose to do so, but it is best to go through proper channels where an appropriate investigation can be done such as through law enforcement authorities, licensing agencies, or through investigative reporters. 
Misconduct: Also, misrepresentations of your identity done for purposes to mislead, manipulate, threaten, or harass are prohibited.   Harassment is legally defined as "A course of conduct directed at a specific person that causes substantial emotional distress in such person and serves no legitimate purpose" or "words, gestures, and actions which tend to annoy, alarm and abuse (verbally) another person."   This is a public guestbook and postings made in this guestbook are not considered confidential nor is any technical information related to these postings.  Also remember that as a guestbook, this is not a discussion forum for private discussion or group discussion.  There are other forums for that purpose.   
 
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Comments:

 

Scroll down through our long list of comments from our visitors:

Name:Sande
Date:12/28/2008 12:11:43 AM
Comments: Thank you (in tears) for being there.
Name:Theresa
Date:12/27/2008 1:45:53 PM
Comments: I am so glad that I came across this web site. It had helped me emmensly. To know that I am not the only one who has gone through Professional abuse.
That which does not kill me, Makes me stronger.
Name:Samantha Levinson
Date:11/11/2008 2:33:41 PM
Comments: It is wonderful knowing that people have come together in support of one another after being violated by someone they have come and are suppose to trust.

In my doctoral program I am researching the power of abuse among female patients and male therapists to find the answers to such questions, Where are these women now? How do they see their former therapists-are they in love, obsessed, feel rejected, or ambivalent. And the women who have come forward, do they feel empowered?

Thanks this information is helpful for my research...

Samantha Levinson, PsyD. student
Name:Allison
Date:10/9/2008 1:43:39 PM
Comments: Hope it's okay to post my (faith-based) poetry site: www.churchabusepoetrytherapy.com....poems of agony, grief, healing and hope came pouring from my wounded soul, upon being voted out of a 31-year church membership, because I got a divorce aftr 31 years of abuse. I fought the spiritually abusive system for 18 months to try and stop the pastor (of disaster) from "counseling" any more women, because 2 of them wanted to commit suicide (because of his "counseling" skills). In the end, on my birthday, my name was put up on a big screen, followed by the words, "Conduct Unbecoming a Child of God."

Called to a meeting of deacons (17 "men"), not allowed to have a woman with me and asked: "Are you still having sex with  ...  [ more ]
Name:sad in louisiana
Date:9/30/2008 8:45:28 PM
Comments: Thank God for this site. I lost my partner to our couples therapist: we went for therapy and she ended up in affair with her. we reconnected, but I am now losing her to depression. she has blocked me out of her life again. I feel like I am dying on the inside.
Name:Amalia
Date:9/22/2008 12:39:17 AM
Comments: Very helpful site.
Name:trusting
Date:9/17/2008 10:12:25 AM
Comments: His words were oddly penetrating and the most soothing I’ve ever heard or felt and I did feel them deep within my breath, and down to my core, his words wrapped around my forgotten fears and desires as he gently pried each free with the sound of his voice and effortlessly ushered them out of those deep lonely spaces.
The first darts had been thrown, laced with threads of intoxicating passion and arousal. Delivered with expert precision.
Name:trusting
Date:9/15/2008 6:23:27 PM
Comments: "The deception of Listening"

“To listen a soul into disclosure and discovery” with the dark side of empathy takes the refined selfish skill of sorcery.
To cradle and trap the heart in a bed of thorns, disguised as a free flowing river able to cleanse and wash away the fears that lie anchored to our soul.
The deceptive invitation of volition is a malignant dark spell powerful enough to capture a soul as it lie exposed desperately seeking shelter under a blanket of seduction intended only to steal another’s power.
Name:Anonymous
Date:9/14/2008 4:17:48 PM
Comments: help
Name:Isabella
Date:8/16/2008 12:04:38 PM
Comments: Thank you for this site, it's very helpful. 20 years after the abuse, I still have times of sinking into depression, but at least I know of ways to climb out of it now-- many thanks to support from Minnesota Walk In Counseling Center and websites like yours. I like your humor section.

The truth: Abusive therapists and doctors are nothing but con-men. Just like con-men in the used-car business, they are highy intelligent sneaks and liars, setting their traps for whoever comes along.
Name:Anonymous
Date:7/31/2008 7:12:11 PM
Comments: There is a thereapist in Newton,N.J. who just recently gave up her liscense to practice.
She sexually abused her male client and now is going under the title "LIFE COACH" Please be aware she is no good no matter what people say. I've been seeking out a attorney to represent me but no avail.
If you start getting emails and phone calls like I did beware it could be her or you're person you are seeing is exploiting you like I was done by her. You will have a very hard case to prove even with all the evidence I have I'm still having a hard time proving it. Other people will say you are delusional unless they see some kind of court action in the form of a lawsuit.
Name:test
Date:7/24/2008 12:58:03 AM
Comments: this is test
Name:Anonymous
Date:7/13/2008 8:23:07 PM
Comments: I find my self viewing porn on the internet
Name:Anonymous
Date:7/5/2008 1:13:48 AM
Comments: I was hospitalized with Guillain Barre Paralysis from a vaccine (Gardasil)--and a DOCTOR decided to fondle my breasts. He also pulled down my pants & touched me inappropriately. I was mortified!!! I reported him to the hospital, but they did nothing. Then, I filed a police report. It looks like he's going to get away with it -- but not for lack of my efforts. I am well educated & intelligent --and I KNOW he did it on purpose!!! He set me up by grabbing my breasts from behind me and slipping his hand under my clothing. He's a dirty doctor -- and I can't prove it "beyond a reasonable doubt". The male police detective was not very nice to me either. He wanted to believe the perpetrator, even though the doctor fals ...  [ more ]
Name:Megan
Date:5/1/2008 4:25:50 PM
Comments: I am relieved to have found this site. After reading many of the posts, I see that I am truly not alone. To be honest, it is even difficult for me to even type this, but I am currently being sexually exploited by my physician of 9 years. There is not one emotion I have not felf, but confusion, sadness and isolation are the tops. (Denial rates right up there too.)Slowly I feel my sense of self deteriorating but keep telling myself I am making mountains out of mole hills. Any advice would be so welcome, I feel I am losing my mind.
Name:Bob Brinck
Date:4/17/2008 10:16:13 PM
Comments: Just to let everyone know that the therapist who abused me finally admitted to the claims i had on her.
She loses her liscense for 2 years and $6,000.00 in fines. But it still doesn't compensate me for the harm she has done the state gets the money. Good luck to you all out there and save all emails and proof you get like i did otherwise the abuser will get away with it. If you have any questions feel free to email me Brinckuscoin@aol.com
Thanks again advocateweb for all you're help and supports.
Bob Brinck
Name: keijo
Date:3/29/2008 7:07:10 AM
Comments: "The Lord is warrior; the Lord is his name."And God will fight against our enemies and win them with bright victory and help us to get peace and harmony after many troubles in our life,hallelujah.Win and help the men to Christ,pray for blesed revival soon,thanks and bless and hope,keijo sweden
Name:Anonymous
Date:3/14/2008 5:24:37 PM
Comments: Be careful not to be too open to being taken advantage of by those who claim to have been abused. they may be predators themselves with other interests. I am so sorry for those who decide to lie. I wish things could be different and the true victim identified in these cases.
Name:Anonymous
Date:3/6/2008 2:16:10 PM
Comments: I know of a therapist who did not engage in sexual interactions with the client, but because the client claims such occurred and falsified information, the therapist is losing the license for at least 3 years and paying over 20k in fines.
Name:chatheshows
Date:3/6/2008 3:01:00 AM
Comments:
Name:Reituepiguity
Date:3/5/2008 7:52:48 PM
Comments:
Name:HeeriaDetty
Date:2/29/2008 12:43:03 PM
Comments:
Name:Exangeamppags
Date:2/29/2008 1:39:37 AM
Comments:
Name:Chilicieddept
Date:2/27/2008 10:26:47 PM
Comments:
Name:naiskiselew
Date:2/23/2008 6:04:01 AM
Comments:
Name:pempophewaphy
Date:2/22/2008 9:29:57 PM
Comments:
Name:Bob Brinck
Date:2/14/2008 11:59:27 PM
Comments: Ms. Hoyt when are you going to get back to me?
Name:Gilfermheme
Date:2/14/2008 8:44:50 PM
Comments:
Name:naiskiselew
Date:2/13/2008 2:08:52 AM
Comments:
Name:pempophewaphy
Date:2/12/2008 7:09:35 PM
Comments:
Name:Cecelia Hoyt
Date:2/7/2008 4:21:11 PM
Comments: For maureen van der most:

Maureen: You asked, "How can I be of any help,besides donating money?"

Yes! Many of the duties of this site are carried out by volunteers. E-mail me and I will forward your question to Cindy Boling, AdvocateWeb's President/CEO. I bet the two of you could work something out.

Thanks for the query!

Cecelia Hoyt
Guestbook Moderator

Imagin1021@aol.com
Name:pempophewaphy
Date:2/6/2008 2:11:42 PM
Comments:
Name:SHRI RAM SHARNAM ASHRAM
Date:2/4/2008 10:27:32 PM
Comments: ROOMS ARE AVAILABLE AT NOMINAL MAINTENANCE CHARGES IN SHRI RAM SHARNAM ASHRAM, VRINDAVAN & HARIDWAR, INDIA.
Visit our site at www.ramashranmashram.com

SHRI RAM SHARNAM ASHRAM
(A UNIT OF SHRI RAM BHAJAN TRUST)


Vrindavan Ashram:
Shri Ram Sharnam Ashram
Parikrama Marg, Raman Reti,
Opp. Radhey Shyam Kuan,
Vrindavan-281121, Dist. Mathura, U.P. India
Mobile No:+91 9810011735
Tele: +91 (565) 2540191

Haridwar Ashram:
Shri Ram Sharnam Ashram
511-A, Sapta Sarovar Marg,
Bhupatwala, Haridwar, India
Mobile No:+91 9810011735
Tele: +91 (1334) 260741

Delhi Office:
Shri Ram Bhajan Trust
C/o. Gulshan Properties & Gulshan Toys,
C-115, Lajpat Nagar-I,
New Delhi-110024, India
Mobile No: +91 9810011735
 ...  [ more ]
Name:maureen van der most
Date:2/3/2008 3:30:48 AM
Comments: I wish I had known about this website many years ago.Better now than never of course. I wish there is publication on this in every single church,doctors office etc.I am clearly a victim of abuse,though for many years I wasn't sure if it was called abuse.Finally my real healing process can start.How can I be of any help,besides donating money?
Name:Lela Albert
Date:1/23/2008 9:47:43 AM
Comments: I am a Child Abuse Advocate from New Jersey who turned in a sexual predator for molesting young boys in both New Jersey and the Philippines.
Church sexual abuse is very much alive these days.
Abuse can be found in all professional settings.
Name:Dr D
Date:1/17/2008 5:08:46 PM
Comments: This is a valuable site, isn't it? I was in an abusive relationship with a supervisor over ten years ago and it destroyed me. It took me years to understand get what had happened to me. Marilyn Peterson's book really spoke my experience. Even now, even allowing myself to get close to thinking about returning to academia provokes a week-long cycle of depression, anxiety, frustrated rage, and so on.

Do you ever feel like you want to yell but you can't? Do you ever find yourself able to yell, but not in front of anyone else? Do you find yourself understanding what's going on but not being able to process the feelings?

I wish there was an equivalent site for the UK.

Good luck for everyone who is seeking h ...  [ more ]
Name:Clovis Thabo Mafike
Date:1/1/2008 3:28:05 PM
Comments: Happy new year and greetings to you all.from:
Clovis Thabo Mafike
94 Pine View,
Norton Street,
Nottingham UK.NG73QD.
Please feel free to circulate my name for your prayers and support for Lesotho.I live in UK.I am now an Evangelist as well as a teacher.I send my love to you all.
Name:regina wolfe
Date:12/12/2007 6:05:36 PM
Comments: I'm looking for the negative impact on a child who has has a student teacher relationships and emotional negativy it comes with
Name:Bob Brinck
Date:11/29/2007 3:03:10 AM
Comments: Just to update anyone who thinks they are alone in trying to get someone to belive us that this does happen. I notified (N.B.C.C.) National board of cetified couselors who did nothing they are located in the Carolinas and certify the people we put our utmost trust in to help us. The etyhics committee there didn't even bother to look into my claims because the Atttorney general in my State (N.J)wouldn't release the evidence I had back to me so I can forward it back to them. Knowing I had stated that I had my therapist on tape. I even have written a short book about it if anyone wants a free copy I will email it to you . Just send me a copy of you're email address and put in the subject free book. Here's my email addr ...  [ more ]
Name:lucass_london
Date:11/21/2007 6:32:08 AM
Comments:
Name:Grace to go on
Date:10/9/2007 2:24:16 PM
Comments: I had an "unusual" therapy with a psychologist several years back. Years after I formally complained, his license was suspended in the state of NJ, but I believe he continued to work under his NY license during that time.
My "relationship" or experience in this unusual therapy was extremely harmful. It periodically haunts me, even to this day. He said he loved me. He took me out to dinner and danced with me while listening to salsa music in the park. He took me out for ice cream and we shared. He kissed me. He took me canoeing. It was THE most romantic time. He strung me along in this fashion which made me stay in therapy until the day I decided to stop. I told him I was confused by it. I didn’t know if it was th ...  [ more ]
Name:Robert Brinck
Date:10/7/2007 9:17:34 PM
Comments: My name is Bob I am looking for a attorney who can assist me in these issues.
I live in New Jersey Sussex county area or any one who wants to talk to me. Maybe we can all do something together in congress.
My phone# is 973-940-0390 leave me a message and I will call you back or email me at Brinck3@aol.com
Thanks and god bless to you all.
Name:Anonymous
Date:10/6/2007 8:06:39 PM
Comments:
Name:Broalmbraible
Date:10/3/2007 8:26:41 AM
Comments:
Name:preelpEntelia
Date:10/2/2007 1:53:30 PM
Comments:
Name:Rita W.
Date:9/24/2007 5:51:04 PM
Comments: I experienced therapy and maybe sexual abuse from a therapist about two years ago. I've tried to find a therapist, but the two I've tried don't seem to want to deal with this. I have a real fear of therapists and am very confused. I have been diagnosed with PTSD from this and have isolated myself with very little support. I don't have anyone to talk to about what happened. I'd appreciate e-mails from anyone who can understand what I'm going through.

Thanks,
Rita
Name:Robert B. Brinck
Date:9/13/2007 11:15:41 PM
Comments: I need a lawyer to help me I am in North jersey U.s.a. thanks
Name:Lela
Date:8/29/2007 8:37:19 AM
Comments: As an Child Abuse Advocate I am very concerned about any kind of professional abuse against individuals whether in the office to in the church.
I am concerned about many non reportings by professional when a sexual predator is allowed in places where children are without properly handling these kinds of situations.
This web site is very well represented.
Name:Mellya
Date:7/27/2007 9:04:56 AM
Comments: This web site helped me a lot when a started to loose hope about the criminal system....It's stil hard but at least here I am not alone. Thanks all :)
Name:Anonymous
Date:7/15/2007 5:50:25 PM
Comments: Thank you for this website. You've helped me an enormous amount.
Name:Anonymous
Date:6/14/2007 9:42:33 AM
Comments: Fantastic quotes.
I appreciate your efforts.
Useful to all.
Name:Anonymous
Date:6/3/2007 1:46:23 PM
Comments:
Name:Family Health And Ed. Services
Date:5/11/2007 10:59:33 AM
Comments: Please contact for help, and advacting. Family Health And Ed. Services
4546 North Street # 5240
Baton Rouge,LA 70806
Name:tamara
Date:5/8/2007 10:07:41 PM
Comments: this is a great website! I need to find some one to talk to in Qld the Brisbane area if you know of any one to talk to the plz let me know!
Name:cinny
Date:4/13/2007 10:37:00 PM
Comments: i have ben abused by my therapist in many ways.
Name:Beth Leary
Date:3/25/2007 12:59:57 PM
Comments: I am a psychtherapist-social worker. The other day a client revealed to me that a collegue had a two year relationship with her. That was Thursday, it is Sunday--my mind is still getting wrapped around it. She thought I would have been hurt--I wasn't, I was confused and angry. At anyrate, that is who I am.
Name:Dave Nicholls
Date:3/7/2007 2:28:37 AM
Comments: Thank you for the help and I am happy to read the info.
Name:Kristi
Date:3/5/2007 12:01:48 PM
Comments: Regarding my last posting, I'm going to go ahead and include a contact phone number. If any therapist abuse survivors from the San Francisco Bay Area are interested in connecting, give me a call at 510-410-3146.
Name:Kristi
Date:3/3/2007 12:56:20 PM
Comments: Hi. I'd like to know if there are any survivors of therapist sexual abuse in the San Francisco Bay Area who might want to get together. I'm in Oakland and would love to have some folks to talk to who "get it." If you respond to this posting I will post contact information.

Thanks!
Name:Cecelia
Date:3/2/2007 8:50:46 AM
Comments: Dear Tori,

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I can tell you that from what you say, your attorney doesn't "get it" when he opines the exploitation was "no big deal." You have several options, as RDF, below, points out. On the other hand, I've learned when it comes to attorneys, it's not whether you were wronged, it's about what you can prove. My best advice is for you to post on our "forum"- AW's message board. You need support and information, as well as advice from folks who *do* "get it", to deal with this. You'll find the "Forum" tab on the left side of this page above the Guest Book tab.

Cecelia Hoyt
AdvocateWeb's Guest Book Coordinator
Name:RDF
Date:3/2/2007 8:25:58 AM
Comments: To Tori,
I have just recently been a victim of sexual abuse by my physician. I am a nurse. It is a long story, but I turned him in to the board of healing arts in my state. Have you started by doing this. I also wrote letters of complaint to the hospital where he is employed, the hospital where he was to move to in the next month (by the way, he lost that job offer) and also to that particular state's healing arts board. The board here is conducting investigation and in fact, moved up the investigation because of the fact, he has perpetrated before. Then after all this, I saw a malpractice attorney and discovered what he did to me is a punishable crime in this state! I have had a confrontation with him and h ...  [ more ]
Name:Tori
Date:2/28/2007 7:41:35 AM
Comments: I was recently a victim of sexual misconduct initiated by my physician of three years, I am trying real hard to cope with the situation. I have spoken with my attorney of two years who was handling a personal injury case for me and he said that basically it was no big deal and what really would I gain by filing a complaint or pursuing a lawsuit. Essentially he told me that I did not really suffer a loss and it was a blessing that I never let my daughters see him.
This doctor was not only verbally sexually explicit but he also ran his hamds up and down my inner thighs and said 'nice' he apoligized, I stayed and then he squeezed my breast while I was on the exam table and said that "I did that on purpose" I am still  ...  [ more ]
Name:Anonymous
Date:2/18/2007 6:29:18 PM
Comments:
Name:Anonymous
Date:2/18/2007 6:24:30 AM
Comments:
Name:Rachel Clarion
Date:1/29/2007 7:22:35 PM
Comments: My exploitation took place over 5 years ago. I just learned today that my case was dismissed by our Judge who failed to see the true nature of this crime. My former pastor lied all thru his deposition, and the church hired him knowing he had a past of seducing women. If any of you are seeking litigation for closure or vindication, please carefully consider this. Justice is rarely found in the justice system.
Name:Anonymous
Date:1/29/2007 11:33:39 AM
Comments:
Name:Anonymous
Date:1/26/2007 10:03:26 AM
Comments:
Name:Anonymous
Date:1/23/2007 8:26:21 PM
Comments:
Name:Anonymous
Date:1/11/2007 1:11:00 PM
Comments:
Name:Anonymous
Date:12/3/2006 9:20:32 PM
Comments:
Name:Bush
Date:11/28/2006 6:11:35 PM
Comments:
Name:Bush
Date:11/28/2006 6:49:55 AM
Comments:
Name:Bush
Date:11/27/2006 12:17:55 PM
Comments:
Name:Bush
Date:11/25/2006 4:41:08 PM
Comments:
Name:Bush
Date:11/20/2006 3:55:34 AM
Comments:
Name:Jersey
Date:11/15/2006 6:13:42 AM
Comments: Thank for making this valuable information available to the public.+
Name:Kim
Date:11/8/2006 1:36:59 PM
Comments: You have a wonderful website here. May God rich bless you always.i
Name:Imagine
Date:10/25/2006 6:15:08 PM
Comments: AW is an invaluable tool for many. AW offers help to those who wonder if they have been exploited by a professional, those who are currently recovering from exploitation trauma, those involved in the litigation process and those who are post-litigation...post-trauma. We are all in different stages of healing.

AW not only provides education and access to leaders in the field of professional exploitation but, most of all, AW gives us personal contact with *each other*-other survivors. How incredible is that? I've looked around, there are few real life in-person support groups available for victims of professional abuse.

KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK
Name:Nicole
Date:10/2/2006 7:28:08 PM
Comments: Found your site in google, and it has a lot of usefull information. Thanx.f
Name:{Holly}
Date:6/28/2006 2:49:40 PM
Comments: I think this website is an amazing shelter for a broken hearts and lost souls.A wonderfull sacret temple that awaits confession.I love it its real;)
Name:stephanie l burts
Date:5/2/2006 3:17:09 PM
Comments: my son tommy was sexually abused for over 4 years.repressed it,it exploded in our lives at 26 years old .the last 10 years have been hell.he still has not restored his life.he was the 1st victim to speak out and report it .even though the pastor ,even though he confessed to over 33 boys and later said it was 50 .the law could do nothing .the statue shielded him.he was in 1998 teaching a singles sunday school class and still molesting .I did find that victim and he plea to 12 years and served 4 .he is now living on parole.in dallas texas his name is ken ward he is a serial pedophile ..........thank you for allowing me to let you know .I sincerly want to advocate for children .to help my son tommy restore and heal.ste ...  [ more ]
Name:Christian !!!!!!
Date:4/25/2006 11:22:46 AM
Comments: Dear Lord, By Your will, Because of my mothers age and health please allow my abuser to make things right with her, concerning me befor the end of this Earth's History, if it be true that You would that we be at peace with all men by for giveness of all,amen!
Name:Adventists spin God
Date:4/3/2006 5:30:31 PM
Comments: Sick to my stomach. Have learned that 7th Day Adventist psycho-kingdom at Berrien Springs Michigan fired Adventist teacher for being pregnant before wedding day. Pre-marital sex is against the rules of the hyper-legalistic and supremely image-obsessed Adventist denomination.

Yet smaller adventist psycho-kingdom in Florida praises and rewards church-employeed Abuser : admitted child molester during childhood; admitted chronic liar; admitted (later recanted) sexual user of brutalized woman he claimed to help; deliberate manipulator. Jekyl and Hyde con man who rakes in dollars for money-obsessed adventist denominaton.

Sex-- forbidden if not hidden. Lying -- OK. Usury--OK. Slander--OK. Libel-- OK. Blaming victim ...  [ more ]
Name:Jody
Date:4/2/2006 6:27:33 AM
Comments: It hurts me beyond belief to find out that so may others are going through the same pain as I am. But it also gives me some comfort.
Name:Rachel
Date:3/21/2006 6:59:49 AM
Comments: Before the news reported stories of phony police officers exploiting women, before the scandal broke out about priests molesting the congregants under their care, advocateweb was here, sounding the clarion call of warning. Thank you all for your dedication, because the best protection is awareness. We can only protect ourselves from the dangers of professional exploitation if we know what it is.
Name:Anastasya
Date:3/8/2006 2:40:00 AM
Comments: Thank you for being generous with your resources... I hope that you will receive more than you need for your time and
energy. Keep at work!
Name:louise garvey
Date:3/6/2006 9:58:08 AM
Comments: i just wanted to tell you h