The Perpetrator as "Victim"
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This is an excerpt from an article written by Debbie
Baier for
the Edmonton
Journal. Copyright © 2002,
Debbie Baier, All rights reserved. Not to be reprinted
without permission of the author.
...Finally there is the perpetrator as victim. He becomes
victimized by the people who profess to care about him and by those
who are his caregivers. People often describe the perpetrator as a
character with a lovable quirk. They don't see him as engaging in a
pattern of exploiting vulnerable people. They excuse his actions by
blaming his victims, understating the seriousness of his actions, or
pointing to all the good he has done within the parish. They play
along with his drama and rather than help him identify his pattern
and work towards recovery, they enable him to continue his
destructive pattern.
When parishioners deny there is a problem and reinforce the
perpetrator's belief that he doesn't have a problem, they are
helping him to avoid facing the truth and they are hindering him in
his need to work on overcoming the destructive pattern. These people
would not buy him a bottle of wine for a gift if they knew that he
were an alcoholic, yet they will be an enabler in his belief that in
his reality he doesn't have a problem. They will support this
reality that he presents and reinforce his notion that the victim
lied, the victim exaggerated, and the victim brought it on herself.
He will put forward the notion that it is time to forget the past
and move on. By doing so, he doesn't seek the help that he needs to
develop a healthier lifestyle. He is not encouraged to seek this
healthier lifestyle by the people who love and respect him.
His caregivers are the church officials who replace the family
unit. His superiors, who would state that he needs to feel their
support, are also enabling the perpetrator. They reinforce the idea
that the proper way to handle his repeated improprieties is to cover
it up and move him to new surroundings where no one is aware of his
perpetrator problems. They don't deal directly with his problem and
he is transferred into a new setting where he can recycle old
habits. Truly his caregivers should acknowledge his problem and
insist he receive professional treatment. They ought to monitor any
regressions after therapy and they need to supply ongoing support so
that when the problem reasserts itself, the safe guards are in place
to immediately abate any abusive actions.
Debbie Baier is publisher of the "STOP CLERGY SEXUAL
ABUSE - An e-mail Newsletter for the Edmonton Archdiocese" available through stopclergysexual@netscape.net
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Disclaimer
Exploitation
