I can’t reverse this order. I can’t step out of line

Step by step, all controlled. Am I getting out of Hand?

Someone is late

There is dirt on my plate

Passing my threshold gate

I just gave up to fate

I’m running the other way to avoid a collision

I’m running this way but it wasn’t my decision

Misguided, misled, mishandled, Mental condition

Tuesday I wake up and my day has all been planned

The medication seems to be working I think I’ll be different.

Scared to death

Holding my breath

I still see germs

I still smell odor

Back on time and all is well. I’m in control. Is that Good?

I tempted fate, I took my meds and did as I should.

Wednesday I wake up and my day has all been planned

I feel really good I think I’ll not plan something already planned.

I feel the panic

I feel volcanic

I’m getting mad

But yet I’m sad

I get back on track and the clock agrees once again.

I’ve always liked things just the way they’ve been.

Thursday I wake up and my day has all been planned

I think I’ll un-plan it all and make all new plans.

I’m not feeling good and things get all hazy

I think about how I got this damn lazy

Where is the needle, where is the razor blade

I need to see red in the bloodiest shade

The pain was too much

I needed that crutch

Don’t look at the scar

Don’t take it away I didn’t cut deep

I hate you, go away, you’re such a creep.

Don’t hug me and tell me you love me after all this

Don’t bandage my wound and give me a kiss.

Okay I messed up I love you so much

Please let me hold you, please let me touch.

The pleasure was great

The pain was not there

Thank you for stopping me

I love you because you care.

Friday I wake up and my day has all been planned

I won’t change my routine. this week has gotten out of hand.

I’m in my cool zone I can’t re-plan this day

I’m angry to a point of silence

My mind I will obey.

Christina Pool © 2002