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The Sentence Was Never Finished
Copyright © 2000, Bonnie Hall

 

In overwhelming silence
I see it all too clear:
The final bell was being rung, in those last hours
as the curtain was coming down.

The false lies you effortlessly built into a wall
with only hairline cracks,
was where you hid your motives
of fear, and punishment.

My innocent life lay before you
and as a surgeon who did not cut to heal -
I was really your prey so
you tore into me to devour what was left.

I'll never know the final plan
and glad I won't see it completed.
Your wishes will never be fulfilled
and your desires have crumbled like dust.

During those last hours
you took all that you could.
And in those final seconds
you ate up all my tears.

And then I walked with invisible steps:
you had taken it all
there was nothing left
I was an empty shell.

Your sentence echoed in my ears
guilty, guilty, guilty -
You led me away and watched me stumbled.
You gave one last glance and grin - and it was finished.

But, I did not die.
 
There I lay -
the pain was torture -
I could not move -
agony was all I knew.

When at last through the tears
I could breath.
I then rolled over
but my hurting would not subside.

At last I had barely enough strength
to push myself up.
But, hit again the despair
that put me down in all the hell you created.

Finally I could not stand it:
I would take care of what you could never do.
I would finish it, but in preparation
I found I had gotten up and crawled.

Now, I had some determination
and in one bold move I stood.
Shaking I would never sit again.
I teetered, and stumbled but I knew you had lost.

Oh, the first steps I took
would never win a prize
but slowly and as well as I could,
I put one step in front of the other.

Now, I may never have a pain free day
or be able to feel complete.
But now each pain-filled step
holds some possibility.

 
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